Blu-ray Movie Review – Microwave Massacre (1983)

Microwave Massacre
Directed by Wayne Berwick
Courtesy of Arrow Video & MVD Distribution
Original Year of Release: 1983
Blu-ray Release Date: August 16, 2016

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I was very excited to hear Arrow and MVD were teaming up to release MICROWAVE MASSACRE. This is another one of those films I had heard about for years, but never found it on VHS (or DVD for that matter) to watch. I’m happy to report the film is just as much fun as I hoped it would be. Full of quirky humor, abysmal special effects, and some of the finest cardboard acting you’ll ever see, MICROWAVE MASSACRE is a B-Horror Movie fan’s dream!

If you are not familiar with MICROWAVE MASSACRE, here is the plot synopsis courtesy of Arrow Video & MVD Distribution:

THEY CAME FOR DINNER…TO FIND THEY WERE IT!!

Microwave Massacre stars legendary stand-up comedian and actor Jackie Vernon (the voice of Frosty the Snowman from the beloved animated Rankin / Bass classic animated holiday special) as Donald, a disgruntled construction worker whose wife s predilection for haute cuisine drives him to cannibalism.
Donald unwittingly stumbles upon a solution to his two major problems in his life his nagging wife and his lack of tasty meals when, one night, he bludgeons his better half to death with a pepper grinder in a drunken rage. Thinking on his feet, Donald dismembers the body and sets about microwaving the remains, which turn out to be rather delicious. Trouble is, now he’s got a taste for human flesh that needs satisfying…

Eschewing all notions of good taste, Wayne Berwick s Microwave Massacre is a deliciously depraved exercise in political incorrectness that has gone on to gain a cult following thanks to a characteristically deadpan performance from lead Vernon, who delivers such choice lines as “I’m so hungry I could eat a whore.” Vegetarians need not apply!

This is definitely one of those “so-bad-it’s-good” films, so don’t expect anything less going into it. But sit back and prepare to be entertained…this is a film I guarantee you’ll watch more than once.

MICROWAVE MASSACRE is shot plainly but efficiently. There’s no outstanding cinematography; the camera is just there to capture the story. This is not a negative at all, but I don’t want any viewers setting their expectations high in the production department. Likewise, the production value appears very low. I would wager the biggest expense this film incurred was on catering for the cast and crew.

The acting is atrocious, but it’s also a big part of what makes this movie so much fun. Comedian/actor Jackie Vernon gives a slooooooow-going performance as the main character, Donald. The snail-speed delivery of his lines made me want to finish them for him in many cases. But I couldn’t keep from laughing as well. His “every man” persona fit perfectly for the character; I don’t think I could see anybody else playing that role.

The gore in MICROWAVE MASSACRE is cheesy but effective. I particularly enjoyed the decomposing (supposedly) head of Donald’s wife that he keeps in the freezer. It looks somewhat realistic, but it’s certainly creepy nonetheless!

A DVD copy of this film touts it as the worst horror movie ever made (see the pic below if you don’t believe me), and while I would argue that, it’s certainly up there with the-best-of-the-worst. And that is definitely a good thing.

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MICROWAVE MASSACRE will make an excellent addition to your horror library, and it will provide numerous hours of fun. This is one of those films you want to watch with a group of friends, just so everybody can pick it apart.

In addition to the film, the Blu-ray features Special Edition contents that include:

• Brand new 2K restoration of the original camera negative
• High Definition (1080p) Blu-ray (Region A) and Standard Definition (480p) DVD (Region 1) presentations
• Original Mono audio (uncompressed PCM on the Blu-ray)
• Optional English subtitles for the deaf and hard of hearing
• Brand new audio commentary with writer-producer Craig Muckler moderated by Mike Tristano
• Brand new making-of featurette including interviews with Muckler, director Wayne Berwick and actor Loren Schein
• Reversible sleeve featuring original and newly commissioned artwork to be revealed

***First pressing only: fully-illustrated collector s booklet featuring new writing on the film by Nightmare USA author Stephen Thrower

The film hits stores tomorrow, so make a note!

MSB

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